For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

Lizzee · 2021-07-03 11:36:25

Dear person whom I would like to maintain some privacy for,
I was your mother, Liz, in 2HOL on Wednesday. I know you are here and the ohol discord as well. I was sad that you did not stay to continue our conversation. I had so much to say but was limited by age and chat mechanics. I would have given you my attention for the full two hours.

I will begin our conversation again with the original topic; Having the desire to be social but having every social interaction turn out negative or chaotic. Continue to practice socializing. Hold yourself accountable for how successful or unsuccessful your interactions are. Ask yourself what you can do to set things off in a positive manner the next time you are presented with a similar opportunity.

When lacking attention or social interactions for too long any kind of attention will provide this type of person with a small dopamine boost to the brain. With negative interactions you will receive your dopamine fix but you may turn off your peers from further socializing. With positive interactions you open up the possibility for more long term social connections, meaning long term dopamine boosts.

You mentioned having a sense of humor some may find distasteful. Perhaps comedy is not the topic for when you are engaging in new social interaction with unfamiliar people. Hobbies can be a good topic of conversation. Talk about shared hobbies or the desire/interest to find new hobbies. You expressed not having a lot of hobbies but mentioned a game I had never heard of. I'm sorry, in the urgency of our conversation I can't remember the name of the game. If you find that no one wants to talk about the topic of a specific game try to keep topics broad when you're first starting out. Assess if the conversation is moving with a positive flow or if you need to change the topic. So instead of going directly to the topic of your favorite game ask the person what their hobbies are. People like to talk about themselves, it makes them feel comfortable. Use this as an opportunity to get to know that person and find topics of interest you have in common.

Second topic we talked about that I couldn't elaborate on; Being born ugly. I explained to you that overt beauty is rare and fades. Attraction has a lot to do with confidence and hygiene. If you have poor hygiene you will not feel your most confident. You explained that poverty stood in the way of your ability to take showers regularly. Poverty is something I understand extremely well.
You brought up a very honest and valid point "if I can hardly afford bread I can not afford showers regularly". To this I suggested natural water gathering, an idea you said you'd rather kill yourself than do.

This is a choice some people make, one that saddens me. From our conversation I believe this to be a very poor choice for you. You are standing in the way of your own personal growth. It's easy to say "I was born ugly" because then you get to hold yourself a victim of the situation. Then you put yourself in the perspective that life is happening to you, that you are only reacting to life. I challenge you to work on changing your perspective. You are creating your future and the future of other's around you through your actions. No one ever says "I was born poor so there's no point in having a job" this is the same for your hygiene and "being born ugly".

Natural water gathering is when you collect rainwater. This can be done even in a city environment. Do you have a fire escape or a window that you could hang a bucket from? You were worried about the water quality. Use 1/8 teaspoon of bleach per gallon of water to keep your natural water cleaner. You know what's grosser than showering in natural water.. a swampy butt. This water can NOT be used for your teeth but can be used for showering and laundry. I will include a picture of the "camp shower" I brought up in our conversation. You don't have to use it outside. You can use this inside, hang it in your shower. Stand in a basin or tub and collect the runoff from washing your body. This runoff water can then be used for laundry.

Don't think collecting natural water is a possibility? What about public water? You mentioned living in a city. Could you not find a public drinking fountain to fill up a couple of gallon jugs at, or even a public restroom. Two gallons of water can fit in a backpack pretty discreetly. How would someone know you weren't collecting drinking water for a long walk?

Good hygiene is more important than overt beauty and it's something you can hold yourself accountable to rather than a victim of. Consider what I've said.. for good for health, self esteem and maintaining social engagements.

Lastly
You mentioned hardly being able to buy bread. Have you considered making your own bread? If you are lacking hobbies, bread making could be a new one for you. Processed foods are always more expensive than homemade ones. I'll use this photo below to elaborate what I mean;

On the left I have the ingredients I would need to make the product on the right.
Buying the product of the right I would spend $1.74 per pound. If you purchased the individual ingredients (costing $6.18) you could easily make 5 loaves of bread and still have half of your yeast left over. This would put the bread you made at $1.23 per pound... cheaper and you have left over product to use for the future.
I understand you might not have the same price for groceries or even the same currency as I do but use this as an example of how to processing your own foods can save money.

I wish for you more positive social interactions. Humans are social by nature. We tend to be anthropomorphic when we are lonely. We humanize animals for pets and search for a face in the moon. May you work towards creating peace in your life where there is currently chaos.

Wishing you the best,
Lizzee

Lizzee · 2021-07-03 11:59:17

Bread home economics https://imgur.com/gallery/5dn0EHX

Camp shower
http://imgur.com/gallery/AeeXuku

Joriom · 2021-07-03 13:19:45

Lizzee wrote:

Lastly
You mentioned hardly being able to buy bread. Have you considered making your own bread? If you are lacking hobbies, bread making could be a new one for you. Processed foods are always more expensive than homemade ones. I'll use this photo below to elaborate what I mean;
On the left I have the ingredients I would need to make the product on the right.
Buying the product of the right I would spend $1.74 per pound. If you purchased the individual ingredients (costing $6.18) you could easily make 5 loaves of bread and still have half of your yeast left over. This would put the bread you made at $1.23 per pound... cheaper and you have left over product to use for the future.
I understand you might not have the same price for groceries or even the same currency as I do but use this as an example of how to processing your own foods can save money.

Time is money. Have you calculated that into the equation? Least time you need to make bread is an hour of spare time. Even more when we include cleanup.
Power for electric stove in expensive in most of the world. Natural gass is not free eighter. How are you going to bake the bread?
What about dishes used and their cleaning? What about the cost of water both for preparing bread but mostly for cleaning everything after? What about dish soap and cleaning utensils?
From monetary standpoint - even if you ommit half of those things - its cheaper to buy mass produced bread than make it on your own in most of the modern world. Mass produced goods can cut corners, negotiate better pricess for mass quantities and save lots on "side costs" just because of sheer volume of product they prepare.
Its the same with home cooking. In developed countries it should be better to eat out / buy prepared meals than home cook. Both financially and ecologically - because of volume production.

Lizzee wrote:

Natural water gathering is when you collect rainwater. This can be done even in a city environment. Do you have a fire escape or a window that you could hang a bucket from? You were worried about the water quality. Use 1/8 teaspoon of bleach per gallon of water to keep your natural water cleaner.

Just so you know: Natural water gathering is... illegal or taxed in a some countries as "you're stealing from limited natural circulation". In my country we're taxed based on the ammount of land you cover without direct drainage to the ground. And I mean - direct. Roof that drains to the side? Taxed. Paved piece of plot with drain ditches? Taxed.

Also... Bleach is expensive and rather dangerous.

Lizzee wrote:

Don't think collecting natural water is a possibility? What about public water? You mentioned living in a city. Could you not find a public drinking fountain to fill up a couple of gallon jugs at, or even a public restroom. Two gallons of water can fit in a backpack pretty discreetly. How would someone know you weren't collecting drinking water for a long walk?

Straight up illegal. Drinking fountain? Whats that? Water is precious and limited. Why would someone do something like that? Haven't you heared about droughts? Don't waste water like that!
Public restrooms in europe are... not free. Most of the time you have to pay to use them.
"can fit in a backpack pretty discreetly". Are you trying to make that poor person steal?

Water is expensive and precious. Try to preach those wierd points to some people and you might end up in a very very bad spot.

Feel like your post was writen from a point of a lot of privilage Lizzee.

Lizzee · 2021-07-03 14:23:20

I agree I am looking at this through the scope of my own experience. Which is something I pointed out when I talked about the cost of groceries possibly being different... or currency value. I suggested however that this could be used as a base idea. A thought to provoke finding items you can produce at home for a fraction of the cost.

I did not ask the person what city they lived in. My ideas are based on what I would do being in their situation. Being stagnant when you feel overwhelmed by your situation will not help you with progression. I didn't factor in time, or gas used to cook the bread. i didn't even factor in the pinch of sugar you would need to feed each yeast portion. I didn't want to bluntly or say in such a crass manner but; if the person has electric for their computer, internet (stolen or paid for, who knows) and time to cause chaos for others via the internet then they have time to make bread... or get a new hobby.

JORIOM It's legal in 48 states of the US to collect your own rain water. There is no law against gathering water from public drinking fountains in the US, many have spouts for water bottles in the US. Though I imagine if you were gathering a large amount often this might become a problem. We already gathered that I may be small minded and writing this from my own perspective.. don't know what else I can say to you. Didn't really expect anyone to reply to this post.

To the person this post is intended for please do not think I am encouraging you to do anything illegal. Consider this friendly conversation not legal, health or financial advice.. I may not have the best idea for you but apply this thought process to how you can help yourself. Find a way to hold yourself accountable to how your social interaction are turning out.

I hold myself accountable that I posted this on a public forum where other's will find it necessary to chime in....Once again, I wish we could have continued this conversation just you and I.

DestinyCall · 2021-07-03 14:38:27

Joriam or other forum moderators, would it be possible to lock this thread so it does not become an argument over the cost of bread-making in different countries? I think the intended purpose of the thread has been served and further discussion isn't really necessary or desirable.

Lizzee wrote:

You expressed not having a lot of hobbies but mentioned a game I had never heard of. I'm sorry, in the urgency of our conversation I can't remember the name of the game.

Was the game called KWAAN? https://www.fanatical.com/en/game/kwaan

Gremlynn · 2021-07-03 20:17:49

The great bread debate of 2021. Dodge and Spoon gonna get in on this?

OneOfMany · 2021-07-03 21:50:33

Gremlynn wrote:

Dodge and Spoon gonna get in on this?

Burn

QuirkySmirkyIan · 2021-07-04 22:09:09

If you live in a rural area maybe you could google/find a safe clean lake to bathe in? I'd imagine in the ye olden days they bathed in lakes or streams.

One Hour One Life Forums

#1 2021-07-03 11:36:25

For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#2 2021-07-03 11:59:17

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#3 2021-07-03 13:19:45

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#4 2021-07-03 14:23:20

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#5 2021-07-03 14:38:27

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#6 2021-07-03 20:17:49

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#7 2021-07-03 21:50:33

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

#8 2021-07-04 22:09:09

Re: For Kit, the person who taught me to make a feather hat.

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