How to test the usefulness of your baby

Tarr · 2018-11-11 22:28:10

As everyone knows we have a lot of new players playing recently and as such they can range anywhere from competent to completely useless. Obviously keeping new players is a huge hinder in any sort of Eve camp since they generally eat all the food and then proceed to die leaving any future kids zero food to eat in their wake.

So how do we test how useful a baby is before we even ask if they're new? Reintroducing the temperature test.

When your child is born first get the baby to talk: Hi baby is normally enough to get most babies to say hi back to you. Now that we know our baby is loaded into the game properly we are going to set the baby near a perfect tile. Do not set the baby too far away or it may just move to a random warm tile. Depending on what the baby does will tell us whether the baby is worth keeping in an early game situation.

Baby instantly starts to follow you around: This baby either doesn't know that keeping warm lowers food drain rate, doesn't care to cost you more food loss, or is just too new in general. If male you always ALWAYS leave these babies to die. Unfortunately being male and new makes them of zero value to an Eve camp. The only thing worse than a new player is a new player who rolled male. They're a bigger resource drain and won't ever make up for what they use. On the flip side you probably don't want to keep girls in this category either but should you need girls you may have to bite the bullet.

Baby stays still where you left it: This means the baby is either AFK or lacks the knowledge or care to move to a better tile. These babies are probably okay to keep compared to the runner babies as they're at least not costing you even more resources by making themselves cold. If you want boys this is the starting line when it is acceptable to keep them should you want males in an early camp. Any girl in this category is likely a keeper solely based on the fact that with so many new players running around you are bound to lose a girl or two.

Baby moves to a perfect temperature tile: This is a good baby and as such should be prized over the other two category babies. You at the very least know the baby understands its one job is to stay warm while you attempt to juggle work and feeding them. Both genders of babies should be kept in this category regardless of how many boys and/or girls you have at the time. These babies can still end up being a bust but are much less likely to and are likely just better players overall.

Another variation of the temperature test is putting babies on slow fires in the desert. Obviously this should not be done repeatedly as once a baby has jumped from the fire they show they have the knowledge that being too hot drains their food faster. The up side to this fire method is you will quickly dispose of any afk babies or new players as the fire burns them alive.

Please do not use the temperature test on babies in towns. I know it is hard to play with a bunch of new players running around like chickens with their heads cut off but it is the best place for them to learn. On the other hand, Eve camps aren't the best of places to try to teach babies so weeding out a few of the less useful babies shouldn't be that big of a deal.

helloworld · 2018-11-12 15:10:55

Hi there. That was well written, and fun to read thanks. Havn’t played in a while, but all the new players joining sounds fun overall.

pein · 2018-11-13 08:18:13

ask them to make a certain face
make faces when you are born

Stormyzabeast · 2018-11-13 15:08:41

Tarr wrote:

As everyone knows we have a lot of new players playing recently and as such they can range anywhere from competent to completely useless. Obviously keeping new players is a huge hinder in any sort of Eve camp since they generally eat all the food and then proceed to die leaving any future kids zero food to eat in their wake.
So how do we test how useful a baby is before we even ask if they're new? Reintroducing the temperature test.
When your child is born first get the baby to talk: Hi baby is normally enough to get most babies to say hi back to you. Now that we know our baby is loaded into the game properly we are going to set the baby near a perfect tile. Do not set the baby too far away or it may just move to a random warm tile. Depending on what the baby does will tell us whether the baby is worth keeping in an early game situation.
Baby instantly starts to follow you around: This baby either doesn't know that keeping warm lowers food drain rate, doesn't care to cost you more food loss, or is just too new in general. If male you always ALWAYS leave these babies to die. Unfortunately being male and new makes them of zero value to an Eve camp. The only thing worse than a new player is a new player who rolled male. They're a bigger resource drain and won't ever make up for what they use. On the flip side you probably don't want to keep girls in this category either but should you need girls you may have to bite the bullet.
Baby stays still where you left it: This means the baby is either AFK or lacks the knowledge or care to move to a better tile. These babies are probably okay to keep compared to the runner babies as they're at least not costing you even more resources by making themselves cold. If you want boys this is the starting line when it is acceptable to keep them should you want males in an early camp. Any girl in this category is likely a keeper solely based on the fact that with so many new players running around you are bound to lose a girl or two.
Baby moves to a perfect temperature tile: This is a good baby and as such should be prized over the other two category babies. You at the very least know the baby understands its one job is to stay warm while you attempt to juggle work and feeding them. Both genders of babies should be kept in this category regardless of how many boys and/or girls you have at the time. These babies can still end up being a bust but are much less likely to and are likely just better players overall.
Another variation of the temperature test is putting babies on slow fires in the desert. Obviously this should not be done repeatedly as once a baby has jumped from the fire they show they have the knowledge that being too hot drains their food faster. The up side to this fire method is you will quickly dispose of any afk babies or new players as the fire burns them alive.

Please do not use the temperature test on babies in towns. I know it is hard to play with a bunch of new players running around like chickens with their heads cut off but it is the best place for them to learn. On the other hand, Eve camps aren't the best of places to try to teach babies so weeding out a few of the less useful babies shouldn't be that big of a deal.

That's what I've been doing! I think they're figuring out to lie when you ask if they're new lol. Genius!

Starknight_One · 2018-11-13 15:24:46

Stormyzabeast wrote:

That's what I've been doing! I think they're figuring out to lie when you ask if they're new lol. Genius!

Perhaps we should start telling them things like, "Sorry, I have one new player to teach already. Better luck next time." instead of just letting them die? I know there are times that being abandoned by my mother because 'too many mouths' is horrible, because I know those other mouths are probably new players who won't survive and I can contribute, but it's just the way it is.

Most of them are afraid that if you say you are new, they'll be abandoned. Let people know you're willing to teach a few newbies at a time, though, and things should get better. (You do have to follow through, though.)

PeaGirl · 2018-11-13 19:27:45

Best trait of at least useless, often a new player or just simply having fun from other's misery, is that they listen.
Quite often when I have had bad luck with eve camp myself and seen at least few sons among me with couple of omelettes in the last few plates remaining, I often end up asking them: "Do you wish to learn something?" which in often times leads him or her ask for basic things, which is often not taught in tutorial and they need brief guide as what to do, for example beginnings of farming, and clay pottery making (which is in tutorial but it seems yet so difficult to remain in head yet in few days.) it will take some time until people adapt to things and that, and if we end up being negative for whole point of new people in existing, it will make the world feel unwelcome to them. We also were newbies the time we began and we pissed lot of ppl with our incapability, so how I've made my useless children become useful to me.

- simple job, fetch branches, if they listen to you, tell them to cut branches and put on basket, like short shafts or curved shafts, for more kindling per run.
- bring food, try to put sharp stone in basket for them in hopes for them to realize at least how to get burdock. You can't just fully expect them to bring everything possible when it comes for bad enviroment, so have some forgiveness.
- berry farming, even adults become useful at this when you need to fetch the berries and cut them and put on tilled soil and wait that 30 minutes for them to grow up. It's tedious, more tedious if food is already scarce, but if you have managed to get bowls and baskets early on, it shouldn't be much of a struggle.

Edit: and if you explain to them, and at least help them realize how things are done, it will likely help them remember, and likely share it with others who are new. So give some power for that sweet, sweet knowledge.

Last edited by PeaGirl (2018-11-13 19:29:53)

TerraSleet · 2018-11-13 20:39:28

PeaGirl wrote:

Best trait of at least useless, often a new player or just simply having fun from other's misery, is that they listen.
Quite often when I have had bad luck with eve camp myself and seen at least few sons among me with couple of omelettes in the last few plates remaining, I often end up asking them: "Do you wish to learn something?" which in often times leads him or her ask for basic things, which is often not taught in tutorial and they need brief guide as what to do, for example beginnings of farming, and clay pottery making (which is in tutorial but it seems yet so difficult to remain in head yet in few days.) it will take some time until people adapt to things and that, and if we end up being negative for whole point of new people in existing, it will make the world feel unwelcome to them. We also were newbies the time we began and we pissed lot of ppl with our incapability, so how I've made my useless children become useful to me.
- simple job, fetch branches, if they listen to you, tell them to cut branches and put on basket, like short shafts or curved shafts, for more kindling per run.
- bring food, try to put sharp stone in basket for them in hopes for them to realize at least how to get burdock. You can't just fully expect them to bring everything possible when it comes for bad enviroment, so have some forgiveness.
- berry farming, even adults become useful at this when you need to fetch the berries and cut them and put on tilled soil and wait that 30 minutes for them to grow up. It's tedious, more tedious if food is already scarce, but if you have managed to get bowls and baskets early on, it shouldn't be much of a struggle.
Edit: and if you explain to them, and at least help them realize how things are done, it will likely help them remember, and likely share it with others who are new. So give some power for that sweet, sweet knowledge.

This. Instead of just leaving them to do their thing, ask them to do a real basic task and make sure there is ALWAYS food at camp. If you find yourself with a baby asking "wat do?" just tell them to grab a basket and a sharp rock and gather food. Admittedly this is a better job for adults because babies are slow, but it's better than them wandering around looking for berry bushes getting constantly sidetracked by hunger and doing nothing productive.

I find a lot of my time spent in eve camps - either as Eve or as a child - is gathering. It's simple, easy and extremely helpful not just to you but to everyone else at camp. It relieves pressure from everyone else and gives them time to figure out what they should do. If you just run around with a basket and a sharp rock bringing back carrots, haddocks etc you feed not only yourself but at least 2 other people who are no longer stopping what they're doing every 30 seconds to find berries. If you have just one other person that knows what they're doing, they can easily get omelettes up and running with little distractions and you can transition to gathering eggs instead to feed even more people.

Tarr · 2018-11-13 20:43:56

Starknight_One wrote:

Perhaps we should start telling them things like, "Sorry, I have one new player to teach already. Better luck next time." instead of just letting them die? I know there are times that being abandoned by my mother because 'too many mouths' is horrible, because I know those other mouths are probably new players who won't survive and I can contribute, but it's just the way it is.
Most of them are afraid that if you say you are new, they'll be abandoned. Let people know you're willing to teach a few newbies at a time, though, and things should get better. (You do have to follow through, though.)

I explicitly tell my children when they fail the test that I can't keep them because of failing. Eve and early game life is like the games hard mode and if I'm playing these sort of lives I'm aiming to get things done. I specifically devote my city Eve lives to teaching new players different things depending on what is near or what I'm doing (sauerkraut/farming/baking/etc). If my kids even show signs of trying to pass the temp test I keep them. That at least shows they have some sort of common sense "oh I'm cold I better get warm!"

I'd rather teach the new players with training wheels than to take them out without any real type of support. I know how much it sucks to be denied joining a camp but early game is just not the place for a bunch of people trying to learn the game. I'm sure in the future they'll look back and understand why people were so much less willing to keep new people.

Tea · 2018-11-13 20:50:38

TerraSleet wrote:

PeaGirl wrote:
Best trait of at least useless, often a new player or just simply having fun from other's misery, is that they listen.
Quite often when I have had bad luck with eve camp myself and seen at least few sons among me with couple of omelettes in the last few plates remaining, I often end up asking them: "Do you wish to learn something?" which in often times leads him or her ask for basic things, which is often not taught in tutorial and they need brief guide as what to do, for example beginnings of farming, and clay pottery making (which is in tutorial but it seems yet so difficult to remain in head yet in few days.) it will take some time until people adapt to things and that, and if we end up being negative for whole point of new people in existing, it will make the world feel unwelcome to them. We also were newbies the time we began and we pissed lot of ppl with our incapability, so how I've made my useless children become useful to me.
- simple job, fetch branches, if they listen to you, tell them to cut branches and put on basket, like short shafts or curved shafts, for more kindling per run.
- bring food, try to put sharp stone in basket for them in hopes for them to realize at least how to get burdock. You can't just fully expect them to bring everything possible when it comes for bad enviroment, so have some forgiveness.
- berry farming, even adults become useful at this when you need to fetch the berries and cut them and put on tilled soil and wait that 30 minutes for them to grow up. It's tedious, more tedious if food is already scarce, but if you have managed to get bowls and baskets early on, it shouldn't be much of a struggle.
Edit: and if you explain to them, and at least help them realize how things are done, it will likely help them remember, and likely share it with others who are new. So give some power for that sweet, sweet knowledge.
This. Instead of just leaving them to do their thing, ask them to do a real basic task and make sure there is ALWAYS food at camp. If you find yourself with a baby asking "wat do?" just tell them to grab a basket and a sharp rock and gather food. Admittedly this is a better job for adults because babies are slow, but it's better than them wandering around looking for berry bushes getting constantly sidetracked by hunger and doing nothing productive.
I find a lot of my time spent in eve camps - either as Eve or as a child - is gathering. It's simple, easy and extremely helpful not just to you but to everyone else at camp. It relieves pressure from everyone else and gives them time to figure out what they should do. If you just run around with a basket and a sharp rock bringing back carrots, haddocks etc you feed not only yourself but at least 2 other people who are no longer stopping what they're doing every 30 seconds to find berries. If you have just one other person that knows what they're doing, they can easily get omelettes up and running with little distractions and you can transition to gathering eggs instead to feed even more people.

Sure, it's a good occupation for them. But not every kid does it when asked to gather a specific stuff. Until now, only one of my kids has gathered what I asked for. One out of those fifty kids I had during my past Eve runs. I give them a basket, I either tell them where or show them the place and they still stay in base or they do something totally different.

I told one son to gather round stones to the east, because we needed a well. He came back with soil. Another kid I asked to gather branches. She stayed in camp.

I don't mind teaching new players. I even love it. But when playing Eve, I need to watch my sanity as well, so Tarr's Tip is very helpful. I only keep Q kids or kids that have passed the test.

pein · 2018-11-13 21:31:28

one guy typed me with two letters
are you new?
no i know the basics
this means that someone has to tell him what to do and when there is no food there gonna die alone

are you steam baby?
from A to E how new are you?

for me, not new means, you can survive for like 40 with wild food and can sustain 1 person at least.

gabal · 2018-11-13 21:57:11

I send them to fetch things when they ask for a job. If they can't survive on wild food they would probably be a liability in Eve camp.

CrazyEddie · 2018-11-13 22:31:38

Not one person you're saying "Are you new" to knows what you mean by "new".

Everyone has their own idea of what "new" means, and the perspective of a new player (I'm not new, I've played five times and I know how to eat berries and feed babies) is different from that of an experienced player (You're a noob until you can start a camp, make an axe, and live until 60).

from A to E how new are you?

This isn't going to be any better.

That at least shows they have some sort of common sense "oh I'm cold I better get warm!"

This is not "common sense". This is something that people have to be taught. Don't use it as an excuse to blow off an inconvenient player; use it as a chance to help someone learn something valuable.

Tarr · 2018-11-13 23:13:07

CrazyEddie wrote:

That at least shows they have some sort of common sense "oh I'm cold I better get warm!"
This is not "common sense". This is something that people have to be taught. Don't use it as an excuse to blow off an inconvenient player; use it as a chance to help someone learn something valuable.

It is taught right in the tutorial that being cold increases your hunger rate. I don't think it is asking a lot for a player to know something they're directly told before they even get into their first life. They are even shown in the tutorial that walking through the desert increases their overall warmth. Either players are skipping through the tutorial (obviously) or not paying attention when they go through.

As an Eve your job is to give your children the best possible chance at survival and attempt to secure something for your future. Kids who cannot figure out they're supposed to move into the warm area instead of standing in the cold don't improve the camps chances. If anything in my experience these are the people who stand around sucking up your resources until they eventually die because they forgot to eat.

I personally haven't the slightest problem with teaching people in game as I do it all the time in a city. However, Eve life shouldn't and isn't the place where you should be trying to teach a bunch of people how to play the game.

pein · 2018-11-14 00:57:53

once i was pissed and yelled at kids, stay on fucking medium temperature, don't fucking move
he understood

if i got to say it twice, it means he wont listen, wont care enough and his/her first actions make me regret keeping them alive
i say it once and that's it, its oen thing to be new, its an other to be ignorant selfish bastard who thinks he is the most important thing for everyone else

think this way: if the baby doesn't listen, why should you? if they want you to stop your work and follow them around, they don't deserve living, i didn't understood how controls work either, i died in few minutes trying to do something but it kept me going, once i was raised and learned how to live in wilderness alone, i tried to spawn to camps with a berry bush and i was a useful farmer

if you die age 0 you don't lose anything, you might born to a same skilled mom and you got same sense of time
i can make a sheep pen in a life and get sheep, i try most of lives, if you cant even make new bowls, you wont know how much work it takes, also if you cannot farm with the ready soil, you arent useful at all

Last edited by pein (2018-11-14 10:28:11)

Dodge · 2018-11-14 06:15:55

Lol the fire test is a good one plus they might learn something when they realise they die so quickly

Lily · 2018-11-14 09:22:40

Personally if I can, I keep all my babies. I support them until they can feed themselves, and then we see how they go from there. The fact of the matter is that it isn't just the newbies who die, more advanced players end up dying all the time too. When you get to the elite players, they don't die very often but even they can die if they lag and run into a snake, or disconnect.

Assuming most of your children will die before adulthood even when you care for them all, if you weed them out too aggressively you are very likely to never make it to the next generation.

PeaGirl · 2018-11-14 09:58:00

Lily wrote:

Personally if I can, I keep all my babies. I support them until they can feed themselves, and then we see how they go from there. The fact of the matter is that it isn't just the newbies who die, more advanced players end up dying all the time too. When you get to the elite players, they don't die very often but even they can die if they lag and run into a snake, or disconnect.
Assuming most of your children will die before adulthood even when you care for them all, if you weed them out too aggressively you are very likely to never make it to the next generation.

This is highly case dependant. Having too many players, like 4-7 toddlers popping at the time, most of them will die, and food pips will be really important when it comes for progression. It is better to have 2-3 kids since it is easier to focu on work while your children grow. You can't just do immediate baby boom, it drains you and your babies surrounding food source drastically, and one baby's death includes 3-5 food pips you spent on them, only to be waste of slot when they die. I myself can't watch that. I have seen this happening way too many times, when female players become too passionate to become baby cannons. That's fun for you, but that's not fun for those who understand where the limit goes.

pein · 2018-11-14 10:47:46

limit is like 3 baby girls total

today all famines came after 5-9 fertile females, i cant see how is that fun for anyone
11 gen, no tools, the eve i guess had no time to tell to kids not to plant in from of kiln, was a good spot but they carry water to soil 2 tiles from original kiln

there was one smart person who got iron and made new kiln

food was scarce and the green biome quite bad
tons of baskets made and lost

i made the axe somehow in like 40 years as eating was so hard, in the end we were down to 2 girls and no water , some guys creeping on me what i do

i spawned to decay town and even if i don't kept kids who move the others werent good either but at least did what i told them

now if i keep 3-4 from that 8 in 14 minutes they need to keep max 4 total, i had like 4 ok ones, but they kept most of them
im ok with teaching if they listen but when you let them alone they just consume

arkajalka · 2018-11-14 17:53:35

I usually spam joy face and dots as a text and run around desert edge controlling the temperature bar. This way oldschool players should have some insight on the skill level of the bb.

Randomname · 2018-11-14 18:06:22

None of the noobs can make a hatchet after leaving the tutorial but they ALL seem to know the emotes. Running is also very annoying, my motto stay where I put you or die (unless I really really need you).

arkajalka · 2018-11-14 18:34:37

Randomname wrote:

None of the noobs can make a hatchet after leaving the tutorial but they ALL seem to know the emotes. Running is also very annoying, my motto stay where I put you or die (unless I really really need you).

Feel free to murder me everytime then, one pair of capable hands less. Bet you are the kinda mom that nags about everything and overfeeds constant... complains and gets toxic for babyes trying to dodge your overfeeding by moving around.

Randomname · 2018-11-14 18:44:17

arkajalka wrote:

Randomname wrote:
None of the noobs can make a hatchet after leaving the tutorial but they ALL seem to know the emotes. Running is also very annoying, my motto stay where I put you or die (unless I really really need you).
Feel free to murder me everytime then, one pair of capable hands less. Bet you are the kinda mom that nags about everything and overfeeds constant... complains and gets toxic for babyes trying to dodge your overfeeding by moving around.

I will do and yes I feed when I have the time, not on the babies schedule. I don't have the time to wait around for them to "F" when I have other tasks to do outside of the main camp. My time is also a valuable resource and it wasn't me that was complaining it was the kid, like I'm sorry next time tell me at the start and I won't feed until you "F" except when you are hungry I won't be around.

One Hour One Life Forums

#1 2018-11-11 22:28:10

How to test the usefulness of your baby

#2 2018-11-12 15:10:55

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#3 2018-11-13 08:18:13

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#4 2018-11-13 15:08:41

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#5 2018-11-13 15:24:46

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#6 2018-11-13 19:27:45

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#7 2018-11-13 20:39:28

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#8 2018-11-13 20:43:56

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#9 2018-11-13 20:50:38

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#10 2018-11-13 21:31:28

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#11 2018-11-13 21:57:11

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#12 2018-11-13 22:31:38

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#13 2018-11-13 23:13:07

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#14 2018-11-14 00:57:53

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#15 2018-11-14 06:15:55

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#16 2018-11-14 09:22:40

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#17 2018-11-14 09:58:00

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#18 2018-11-14 10:47:46

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#19 2018-11-14 17:53:35

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#20 2018-11-14 18:06:22

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#21 2018-11-14 18:34:37

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

#22 2018-11-14 18:44:17

Re: How to test the usefulness of your baby

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