When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

karltown_veteran · 2019-02-09 21:09:57

1. Snakes
Do: Chase them around shouting "tss tss tss"
Don't: Hump them, unless you're willing to die. And if you must hump them, do it while they're going "tss tss tss" and shaking their tails.
Do: tease them with snakeskins
Don't: Try to just touch them, you can't reach

2. Mouflon
Do: Kill them, and then hump their dead body
Don't: Try to chase them, that's just boring
Do: Stick stones up their butts
Don't: Let out bears

3. Wolves
Note: Wolves are not recommended for sex
Do: wear a mouflon or sheep skin when trying to seduce them
Don't: Let them bite you, unless you're into that stuff

4. Geese
Note: Geese are highly recommended for sex
Do: Ruffle their feathers, use flint chips on their feathers and then lay them around
Don't: Do foreplay
Do: Kill them and play with their bodies
Don't: Flint chip their dead body. Sicko.

5. Boar
Note: Boar are easily interchangeable with wolves, the sex results are similar
Don't: Try to do it with them if they're just running around, they're too fast for that
Do: Kill them when they have a baby, take their baby and.. do what you want with it... then play with their body

6. Bears
Do: Stand on an item and let them go to the left and right from you
Don't: Stand on bare ground
Do: Use a flat stone on them when they are to the left or right of you
Don't: Call multiple bears, unless you're into that

7. Mosquitoes
Note: Highly not recommended for sex
Do: Stand on an item
Don't: Go into the woods, there are too many skeeters there

8. Turkeys
Do: Chase them and listen to them gobble
Don't: Try to hump them
Do: Shoot them, pluck one of their feathers out and stroke them with it
Don't: Wear their bodies on your head. Weirdo.

9. Bison
Note: Not great for sex
Do: Chase them around with corn
Don't: shoot them

10. Rabbits
Note: Snares make great sex toys
Do: Snare them and then play with their corpse
Don't: Keep making them go back into their hole

11. Horses
Do: If you must, use a lasso at least
Don't: Chase 'em around

Note: If you wanna see farm animals I'll gladly oblige

Edit: Pictures

Last edited by karltown_veteran (2019-02-09 21:29:46)

Solbusaur · 2019-02-10 22:39:28

You're a sick furry, Karltown.

karltown_veteran · 2019-02-11 22:56:47

Solbusaur wrote:

You're a sick furry, Karltown.

Darn right I am

GreatShawn · 2019-02-12 01:03:21

No wonder karltown didn't finish "no nut november"

karltown_veteran · 2019-02-12 02:02:04

GreatShawn wrote:

No wonder karltown didn't finish "no nut november"

-__- I'm a girl dude

GreatShawn · 2019-02-12 05:40:12

karltown_veteran wrote:

GreatShawn wrote:
No wonder karltown didn't finish "no nut november"
-__- I'm a girl dude

No Nude November

Or Prohibit Pussy Parties if u want that extra spice.

antking:]# · 2019-02-12 06:15:04

karltown now I know what you are doing once you get banished to DONKYTOWN... shish now your making me wonder if some of those mouflon babies were actually yours! no wonder you want to get sent to DONKYTOWN, you want to be alone with your animals!

karltown_veteran · 2019-02-12 13:32:25

antking:]# wrote:

karltown now I know what you are doing once you get banished to DONKYTOWN... shish now your making me wonder if some of those mouflon babies were actually yours! no wonder you want to get sent to DONKYTOWN, you want to be alone with your animals!

Actually, that was the majority of what I did in donkey town

narla_hotep · 2019-02-12 20:02:35

karltown, were you the old pervert who just got murdered for goose sodomy in Anal Town? (wow, never thought I'd ever write THAT sentence in my life!)

hmrka · 2019-02-12 23:15:34

useful tips thx karltown, however if i somehow ended up cursed and was your kid while you did sodomy with animals in donky town, i would /sad and run off.

narla_hotep wrote:

karltown, were you the old pervert who just got murdered for goose sodomy in Anal Town? (wow, never thought I'd ever write THAT sentence in my life!)

some time ago one of my old cousins got murdered for humping a dead german shepherd's body and being a furry. Also If I was there I wouldn't murder him for sodomy with a goose, I would murder him for picking it up all the time! the sound is so annoying - like almost as bad as putting bellows in klin...

One Hour One Life Forums

#1 2019-02-09 21:09:57

When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#2 2019-02-10 22:39:28

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#3 2019-02-11 22:56:47

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#4 2019-02-12 01:03:21

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#5 2019-02-12 02:02:04

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#6 2019-02-12 05:40:12

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#7 2019-02-12 06:15:04

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#8 2019-02-12 13:32:25

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#9 2019-02-12 20:02:35

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

#10 2019-02-12 23:15:34

Re: When Evehood gets lonely - a guide to doing it with wild animals

Board footer